For Everything a Time

Lately, I’ve had to remind myself of this more often than normal. With the thousands of changes we’ve had in the past few months, including our move, new friends, and new jobs, new everything, I have to remind myself that there is a reason that we were sent here.

The additional news of another loss in the form of a loss of a potential surrogate, brings back feelings from years ago and reminds us that our road to parenthood may still be in the distant (far) distant future. I know that there is a reason things happen the way they do, it’s just so hard to wait and watch them play out as they will. 

Everything happens for a reason…

 I know that my past experiences have shaped me into a better person and into the person I am today, but still, this past week has not been fun and once again, I feel as if we’ve hit rock bottom, only to have to climb our way out and start the journey over again.

I know that God has a plan for both Kris and myself and that we just need to enjoy the journey along our path in life.

Giving Samantha A Voice

Let’s get the word out about this new movie, Return to Zero,  and help raise awareness about stillbirth!

In 2009, my husband and I lost our daughter, she was stillborn. Her death caused grief and heartache like we  hadn't known was possible but also brought us closer together. In the weeks following the loss of our daughter, I realized that my purpose in life would be to help raise awareness and to provide comfort and support for families that were also dealing with this type of loss. 

This past month, I learned about an amazing movie that is being created, RETURN TO ZERO. I was given the chance to become a local leader and am so excited for the opportunity to help raise awareness and also meet families who have been in similar situations as myself and my family.

Infant loss awareness, especially stillbirth awareness is a passion of mine, after the loss of my daughter, I want to help other families in similar situations. As this movie is currently in production, we need to help ensure that the movie makes it to the local movie theaters.

RETURN TO ZERO is the first film ever created that focuses solely on stillbirth. The movie casts includes Minnie Driver, Paul Adelstein, Alfred Molina, Connie Nielsen, Kathy Baker, Andrea Andes, and Sarah Jones. They are working to create an amazing movie that will help to raise awareness and share insight into what the family deals with and experiences during stillbirth. This movie will help to show those who might not understand, how these families are touched and the experiences that an infant’s death may cause.

How can you help? Sign the pledge, see the movie. We need as many pledges as possible!

I have signed up to be a local leader for the film and in the next 30 days, I am hoping to get 100 of my family and friends (or more!) to sign up and pledge to see the film opening weekend (which has yet to be determined- hopefully late 2013 or early 2014). By PLEDGING to see RETURN TO ZERO in theaters when it shows in your community we can prove to Hollywood and distributors that that there is an audience for a film about this difficult but important subject matter.

You can sign up here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1HqU43R7iij8WJt1bavZkmjhmPdci56qakUUKt2VfvWg/viewform

It’ll take about 30 seconds to fill out the form. Please list me (Natalie Welanetz) as your local leader and that's it! The city with the highest number of pledges at the end of the pledge drive will not only receive a special screening of RETURN TO ZERO but writer/director and producer  will attend to host a Q&A afterward!

So, if you live in Oak Harbor or  Whidbey Island in general, please list Oak Harbor, WA as your city/region. Let's bring these guys to Washington!! I understand that you aren't positive that you'll see the film and that's okay! But I encourage you to fill out the form and show your support anyway!!

Please help me make sure that RETURN TO ZERO makes its way to theaters! Let's give our Samantha and so many other stillborn babies the voice they never had!!

Thank YOU!!

Other links you may find helpful: 

https://www.facebook.com/ReturnToZeroWashingtonStateBreakTheSilence?fref=ts

https://www.facebook.com/returntozerofilm?fref=ts

Our Mother's Day Weekend

With Mother’s Day coming up tomorrow, I’m preparing myself for a hard day, a day that I’ll want to shy away from Facebook or Google and just spend time reflecting. The loss of our only child has forever changed the way I think and feel about Mother’s Day, this holiday is a yearly reminder that I too SHOULD be celebrating this day…

This weekend, we’re planning to have a pretty relaxing few days, not make a big fuss about tomorrow and just have time to ourselves. We’re not stationed around any family so won’t have any Mother’s Day parties or functions to be expected to show up for.

Mother’s Day is typically a very hard day for me, a day that I think more about the fact that I should be celebrating this day with my daughter, not grieving her loss. This year is no different, but at least we do have our adoption plans in the works and can look forward to future Mother’s Day holidays. I’ve joined my adoption friends as a “mommy to be, whenever that may be.”

A Mother's Day For Me Afterall...

Last week, I came across an article about International Bereaved Mothers's Day. As an angel mommy, the traditional Mother's Day holiday is one of the hardest days of the year for me. It's hard to find others that truly, truly understand how I feel on days such as Mother's Day and this was something that I had told myself I'd have to learn to live with.

International Bereaved Mother's Day is a time for bereaved mothers to come together, celebrate the memory of those they have lost. This day helps mothers who have experienced infant loss to know that there are others who understand and sympathize with them.

On this Bereaved other's Day, I treasure the short memories of our darling baby girl, Samantha. While next Sunday, Mother's Day will still be a difficult day, I am glad to have found this day to reach out to other mommies in my situation, mothers who are missing their angel just as we are missing ours. We know that she is watching over us and has many other angel baby friends with her.

When will my turn come?

In the past year, I've had several, I mean, several friends to have had children or to find out that they are pregnant. At one time, I had twenty friends that were pregnant or had young babies. While I have gotten to the point in my life that I can be happy for my friends when they are expecting, this journey has taken years and months to reach this point in my life.

In the last few months, I've had a few family members learn that they were expecting and I could not be happier for them, I will be an aunt by this time next year and cannot wait! I also learned of a few other friends this week that are expecting and look forward to their journey as well.

While the sadness for our first baby never really disappears, I don't break down every time someone mentions a baby. I've learned to treasure her brief memory and to hold on to those thoughts rather than dwell on the sadness. I'm not always as good at this as I'd like to be and I certainly have my days where I just want to mope around. This past week has been especially hard for me in some respects. We're relatively new to the area that we live in and are finally making a few friends. After learning that a friend is expecting and listening to pregnancy excitement, I once again wonder, when will my turn come??